today is the last day of my medical leave. i am going to use it to catch up on sleep and think some things thru.

i am emotionally tired. i am in a situation that i cannot understand. this is odd for me, considering that i am normally so realistic and reasonable. the current situation baffles me.

i am involved with someone whom i have mixed feelings for. he is a beautiful, loving man and he loves me to pieces. but i push him away constantly, for fear of him hurting me. weak, isn't it?

yeah, i know.

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